I couldn't stop ruminating on my shortcomings and lamenting on my mistakes. I was doing everything wrong or procrastinating not doing anything at all. To work through my anger and frustration I tried therapy, but then I knew more about ADHD than everyone around me. I would engage my relationships ready to fight to prove why I could or to justify why I could not. That seemed to be doing more harm than good. Finding out I had ADHD wasn't enough. The diagnosis told me what was wrong. It told me I was broken. I felt desperate and hopeless.

Then, I opened up a book and it said, "...I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well." After reading that my attention started shifting from what seemed broken, depserate and hopeless, to what was wonderful and right. I started realizing the brain I thought was broken and defective was just wired differently. Now I have the courage to "...know full well." the unique strengths and abilities I have come to appreciate.

What is the story that is being written about your life? Is it a story of being broken, desperate, and hopeless or a story of what is unique and set apart for a special purpose? Coaching is the process of writing a new story for your life and then living that story with courage. Each new strength revealed is a "knowing".

Identify one thing that is right about you no matter how small or insignificant it may seem. Then, out loud, in your own way, repeat the following:

Today I know that I am _______ and it is wonderful.

Something wonderful is waiting to be revealed to you! I would love to know what that is. Let's talk!

Is pressure making your brain freeze? Here are 4 steps that will help:
Request a Break:
Practice this statement repeatedly in the mirror, "Let me think about that and get back with you." It's ok to let someone know politely you need a brief moment to gather your thoughts when your response is suddenly required.
Take a Deep Breath:
During the break close your eyes. Is your heart thumping or mind racing? take a deep breath and count backwards slowly from 5. This helps your body shift down to a lower gear.
Begin Again:
Try again and go slowly. Going somewhere slowly is more effective than going nowhere quickly.
Dump it:
Share your frustration and anxiety with a trusted friend. If a trusted friend isn't available, then do the same into your voicemail. Write it into a journal. Dump it. It's ok. Dump it!

Looking for a safe place to relieve the pressure? Try here!

I remember it vividly. It was my turn to solve the math problem Mrs. Dawson wrote on the chalkboard. A moment of silence and then those dreaded words, "Steve, we're waiting!" I didn't know what to say. The harder I tried to think, the more I panicked. I just wanted to be able to do it! But in the moment, when it mattered, I froze. It was like running off a cliff without a bridge to take me to the other side. I broke down in tears, burying my head at my desk in the back of class where I hoped I wouldn't be noticed. The teacher moved on to the next student and I was left humiliated.

I never understoodwhat happened that day until an ADHD Coach explained to me that the part of my brain responsibile for focusing decreases under pressure when I try to concentrate. I realized all those times people told me to try harder made things worse. Coaching helped me see myself differently. I learned I wasn't lazy, stupid or crazy. I realized that I had a way of learning and working that revealed a unique set of strengths that I'm using to my advantage even today. Coaching relieved the pressure and gave me the support I needed to succeed!